Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
