Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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