You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
