i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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