I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Couch. On fire.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize