Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Randomize
