JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
