tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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