Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I would ride that face into the sunset
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
