PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
