At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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