my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
