You're earring is so big in my mouth
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
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dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
