you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
