hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
We just shotgunned beers for America
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
