I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
