omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Randomize
