We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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