Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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