what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Randomize
