What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
