walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I think people are normalizing furries
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
