I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
