Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
