I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
