Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
