I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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