so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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