I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
