Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize