just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
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