He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
