I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
