Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Randomize
