she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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