Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
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