I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Randomize
