question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
