You're so nebulous sometimes
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
