Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
