Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Randomize
