she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
