I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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