I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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