...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
