There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
They took my balls.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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