I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
