The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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