wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
