Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
